I Know it’s Hot in Baltimore When…

 

Considering that Captain Schenanigans just came back into the house from re-filling the bunny water bottles to include ice cubes, I’d say a little attention paid to the weather might be in order. Even the barn cat is sneaking in these days and heading down to the basement…

    I know it’s hot in Baltimore when…

1. I put veggies from the fridge into the bunny cage and the bunnies just lay on them (their ice packs melted hours ago) instead of nibbling. Ahhh…cold celery on my tummy!

2. The scent of crabs in a seafood carry-out’s dumpster wafts into my car at traffic lights.

3. I look into the yard where I have 9 free range hens, and see NO ONE anywhere. They are all hiding in the shade under the deck, or shoved under the wood pile.

4.My cat looks dead. 20160812_114133

5. My kids insist pajamas are “too hot” to wear to bed and sleep in their undies- yet still climb in my bed at O’ dark-thirty and cling on like a barnacle to my right side.

6.My 4 year old insists upon wearing his fleece lined hoodie to grandma’s house- because how else can he make me look neglectful?

7.I haven’t rested my head on my head rest while sitting in 695 traffic for weeks, because if I don’t wear my long hair piled up in a bun on the back of my head I just might shave it off!

8.All the Berger cookies arrive melted to the stores.

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9. Both kids want to wash my car. RIGHT. NOW. With the hose of course. And the windows of the house. And the whiny cat. And use the hose water to scare the hens off the deck. Pretty much any hose related chores. Water the pumpkins? Sure can, Mama! Wash my dirty feet off, you betcha! Look, I’m washing my bike without (ever) being asked! High noon seems like the perfect time to water the grass, right?

10. I set the crock pot to cook on the back deck before heading off to work, because Child Protective Services will confiscate my children if I feed them Chickfila one more time, and the Lord knows that I am not turning on that stove for anyone but Jesus himself! IT IS TOO DANG HOT TO COOK!

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